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If you see me smiling it`s because I`m thinking of doing something evil or naughty ... If you see me laughing it`s because I`ve already done it
Before we start this relationship, I am going to need you to explain a few pics in your Facebook albums.
The sun shouldn`t be allowed to come out until after your hangover.
Halloween always exposes my weakness for Milk Duds, I am powerless. Tomorrow I will attend MDA, Milk Duds Anonymous
One should love animals.. They are so tasty.
There is a special place in hell for people who are not ready to order when it`s their turn.
Just ordered a chicken and an egg off the internet to see which comes first. I`ll keep you posted.
Hate is too powerful an emotion to waste on somebody you don`t even like.
Well I didn`t know that minding my own business becomes part of your business to mind
If you don’t count any of my failures, I’m quite successful.
Some people are just pure evil...I should know because I`m one of them.
It`s not my fault you thought I was normal.
Never take advice from people on the Internet. Not even this.
Just tore the tag off my mattress and there’s nothing the feds can do about it. MUAHAHAHAHA!!!
Sometimes, when I "like" your post, it`s because my touchscreen is too sensitive and I only meant to scroll by your ass. Sometimes. ;)