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There are no bad pictures. That`s just how your face looks sometimes.
Saw a midget go into a store while wearing a KKK outfit and thought... That`s a little racist.
Just saw a guy with a Support Dyslexia bumper sticker on the front of his car.
I only seem to remember I want to lose weight after eating 6 cookies.
Iām starting to think that some of you are misspelling words on porpoise.
My favorite thing about decorative towels is how you`re not allowed to use them. Because nothing says class like useless towels.
I`d bite my nails less if there wasn`t always chocolate frosting under them.
Life is like a bowl of soup; you only get blown if you`re hot.
Pro tip for picking up girls - keep your back straight and lift with your knees.
I thought we were both kidding when we made plans for me to watch your kid.
Would you like to save money on your car insurance? Walk ... Just sayin
I repaired my blow up doll with superglue.....that was an awkward trip to the emergency room (<>..<>)
Send me one more game request and I`m showing up at your house drunk, at 4am, naked and demanding a game of Twister
A recent study has found that woman who carry little extra weight live longer then the man who mention it
My girlfriend is about to do this ice water bucket challenge. She don`t know yet though she`s still in bed