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I must say I enjoy it more when a girl asks me out. To me, there`s nothing more attractive than that high level of confidence, initiative, and poor judgment.
Sadly, I don`t think anyone has Wang Chunged once tonight... :(
If it rains on a dream catcher, does that make it a wet dream catcher?
Lazy is a very strong word, I like to call it “selective participation.”
Those Box Tops that raise money for schools really should be on wine labels and cases of beer.
I was a huge tomboy. Like, I had barbies, but only because my ninja turtles needed bitches.
Jehovah`s witnesses tell the worst knock, knock jokes
There’s always that one person that catches you doing something weird.
Still no news on the royal baby. One will assume its being delivered by Royal Mail
I`ve probably spent a solid year of my life just staring into the refrigerator
I need to get out of bed and do something so I can justify taking a nap later.
Come to think of it, I’ve never seen a taxi fill up at a gas station
Everyone sends text like "good morning sunshine", so I texted "good morning solar eclipse" ... Yeah, don`t do that.
"You blew a tranny" means something completely different to an auto mechanic.
Odd Fact: The names of characters in Inception are: Dom, Robert, Eames, Arthur, Mal and Saito. Note the first letters = DREAMS.