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That awkward moment when there`s not a single awkward moment
I appreciate your help, but no thanks, I can f*ck up my life on my own.
I just wanted you all to know that I’m leaving Facebook. This ride has been a blast and I’ve made a ton of friends who I really do consider friends in the truest sense. Your humor and wit is amazing. I’ll miss all of you, but I’ve decided I need to spend more time with my family. So... see you after breakfast
Your boyfriend has long hair too. I sometimes have trouble figuring out who the girl is in the relationship.
I`m not lazy, I`m in energy saving mode.
If you use the word "gay" to desrcribe something that is "merry or happy" then you`re gay.
The queen honey bee has up to 40 sexual partners a day, just like your ex.
I laughed more at the Broncos offense then I did at the commercials.
How dare you incinerate that I don`t know big words.
I am taking a shot for every “like” I get on this status. Then again, I’m taking shots whether you bastards like it or not.
Today is National animals day, please take a moment to remember your ex :p:p:p.
I have no idea how I used to look for things in the dark before I had a cellphone.
There is nothing worse then trying to watch porn with a slow internet connection.
Know what? If they had Neosporin back in 1931, that nasty scar on Frankenstein`s forehead would have been far less noticeable.
What was that idiot thinking when he invented white underwear?