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Do you ever order a club sandwich just to feel like you`re a part of something?
Having a bit of a lazy day, sitting in my underwear looking for jobs online ... My boss doesn`t look amused
Just saw a coyote next to the highway. I hope this tunnel ahead isn`t just painted on.
Brains are awesome! I wish everyone had one...
Do gun manuals haue a trouble shooting section?
I didn`t mean to offend you, that was just a bonus.
Good things come to those who wait. Better things come if you stop f*cking around and make sh!t happen.
I watched my first porn movie today. I looked so much younger back then.
How come we can put a man on the moon but we can`t made a smoke alarm that can differentiate between a house fire and cooking sausages?
Walking out of a store after not buying anything and thinking, “try not to act like a criminal, try not to act like a criminal”
Been reading up on the thesaurus lately because a mind is a terrible thing to garbage.
I stop at random Jehovah`s Witness houses and drop off copies of Rolling Stone.
Did you guys know that turning up the radio fixes almost all your car problems?! Crazy.
"Love your friends, Not their sisters." & "Love your sisters, Not their friends." -By Mummy...
Everywhere is walking distance if you have the time.