Your home to over 150,000 silly Facebook statuses! Find the perfect witty, silly, or downright funny status to share with your friends and family. Check in daily for fresh updates!
More food should come with prizes inside it.
I saw a guy today at Starbucks. He had no smartphone, tablet or laptop. He just sat there drinking his coffee. Like a psychopath.
Wow!!, What a day..I volunteered at a soup kitchen, mowed my lawn, went to 2 Birthday parties, ran 6 miles, then told a bunch of lies on Facebook.
I love my car. Without it, I would not be where I am today.
Teaching your dog to fetch a beer is smart. Fetching it from the neighbours house is genius.
Showed my daughter an MRE. The package said "Peelable Seal". She said I`m not eating no seal.
I will not be impressed with technology until I can download food from the internet.
Shout out to weathermen telling us the barometric pressure like we know what the hell to do with that information.
Of all the lies I`ve told in my life, "Just kidding" is my favorite.
Did you know you have the right to remain silent even when you`re not being arrested?
Life hack: You can park wherever you want if you put your hazard lights on and take your tire off.
Lately I`ve been convinced that some people were born solely for purpose of eventually pissing me off...
I lost 3 pounds over the weekend, but not to worry I found them lastnight at pizza hut
I hate long distance relationships. That`s why I moved the fridge into my bedroom.
Friday. The golden child of the weekdays. The superhero of the workweek. The welcome wagon to the weekend. The famous F word we thank God for every week.