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The face jewelry is getting out of hand. I saw a guy today that looked like he had done a face plant in a tackle box.
I`m actually a pretty normal person when you ignore the faint cries for help coming from my basement..
Man, those 2013 Mayan Calenders are REALLY hard to find...
Dear life, I`ve had enough bullsh!t to last a while. Can we take a little break please.
FUN THING TO WRITE ON A POST CARD: “Weather is great, having tons of fun! Are you still planning to murder your mailman?”
I bet it’s called Almond Milk, because no one would buy Nut Juice.
Every new day means new opportunities... to make mistakes and f*ck things up.
They say 1 in 3 people cheat in a relationship. I`m not sure if its my wife or my girlfriend.
At the Touch of Love..Everyone Becomes a Poet !
But..At the Touch of Breakup Everyone Becomes a Philosopher... ^_^
Is Nudeism a religion?
Most difficult job ever.......Working in a bubble wrap factory......Imagine the self control needed.
Walmart does not have a dildo section. But it`s always fun to ask their employees if they do.
I assume when I get put on hold after I call customer service, it`s because 2 guys are flipping a coin to see who pretends to be the manager.
And remember friends, condoms aren`t always protective....my friend was wearing one and he fell down the stairs
“I’m sorry” and “my bad” mean the same thing… Unless you’re at a funeral.