Your home to over 150,000 silly Facebook statuses! Find the perfect witty, silly, or downright funny status to share with your friends and family. Check in daily for fresh updates!
Why can`t braille just be in the shape of the letters?
Just drove past the house where I lost my virginity. There wasn`t even a plaque or anything. Pretty ridiculous if you ask me.
An apple a day is bullsh!t. Apples are dangerous. Just look at Eve, Snow White, Blackberry or any pig at a luau.
I totally tricked this woman into sleeping with me. All I had to do was put a ring on her finger and live with her for the rest of my life.
I pretend I don`t care but deep down I really still don`t care.
People that chew gum and drink alcohol what the f*ck is wrong with you.
Why is there Head & Shoulders shampoo? Who has hair on their shoulders? Who`s shampooing their shoulder hair? ... please come forward.
Opening the Tupperware cupboard at home should be regarded as an extreme sport.
I got in the shower with my slippers still on this morning. Is this the start of dementia or the continuum of stupidity I wonder?
You`re an intellectual who doesn`t read books? I completely understand because I`m an athlete that rarely moves.
? Single ? Taken ? Depends on who`s asking.
Working on my 32 point plan to be more spontaneous. Any suggestions?
Getting my kids to the airport always feels like I`m recreating the first 10 minutes of "Home Alone."
I hate when I accidentally eat everything in sight.
Friday. The golden child of the weekdays. The superhero of the workweek. The welcome wagon to the weekend. The famous F word we thank God for every week.