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is 100% sure that you are looking at my status. (:
Some people might as well post ‘Wants Attention’ as their Facebook status.
+ if you wish you could record your dreams.
Couples have an amount they can spend up to without discussing with each other. Mine is around $50. My wife`s is around $643.27. Apparently
Do you know how many poisonous apples I`d have to give out before I was considered to be the fairest in the land?
I really like compliments but I don`t want anyone talking to me...
Guys that try to pick up girls on facebook are pathetic. Girls if you agree, message me your number so we can talk about it.
My wife is a perfectionist but she made an exception in my case.
I know the voices aren`t real, but man do they come up with some great ideas.
I`m gonna hang a Batman costume in my closet just to screw with myself when I get Alzheimer`s.
The world would be a better place if we all got along like the "Price is Right" audience.
Some days should come with a warning label: This day is going to suck, bring alcohol.
How am I supposed to show a girl I like her, if I can’t even make her a mix tape anymore?
Pokémon means a totally different thing if you`re stuck in prison.
Facebook is like a fridge full of old food you know what is in your fridge but still you go and check if it changed.