Your home to over 150,000 silly Facebook statuses! Find the perfect witty, silly, or downright funny status to share with your friends and family. Check in daily for fresh updates!
Match dot com, but for socks.
Helpful Tip: Always remember to speak clearly when complimenting a woman`s boots...
If ignorance is bliss. You must be the happiest person on this planet.
Sorry to all my friends and family members who didn`t know I was a freak until they saw my likes and shares on Facebook.
If I was supposed to share them, they wouldn`t be called nachos.
Why is it called a menstrual calendar and not an egg timer?
For most things there’s MasterCard For everything else there’s Vodka
If money can`t buy happiness what do you pay a hitman with?
I don’t have a problem with friends who ask to borrow money. I love a good laugh as much as the next guy.
Waved to my ex today, next time I might use all my fingers
Dear Diary, the ugly woman at the bank cut in front of me today." Woman: "EXCUSE ME?!" [whispers]"Dear Diary, I think she can hear me."
Do you have neighbors?.. Do you have extension cords?..... Are you paying too much for electricity?
Folks, there`s no need to say GOODNIGHT on Facebook. NO ONE will be thinking " hey where did they go".
You don`t need to use your words if you`re carrying a machete. People just seem to figure it out.