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Sometimes all you need is $100,000
I just made you think of an elephant
Finally 21 and now legally able to do things which i have been doing since 15….
I like restaurants because the people have to be nice and feed you.
If you love something set it on fire, if it... no wait, is that right? sh!t! Be right back...
I woke up with a headache this morning but she went to work.
There`s no mirrors in this self checkout?!?
The truth is, men put the lids on jars that tight so you’d need us, we’re not that stupid.
Fun thing to do: Before leaving someone`s house, ask them if you can take a roll of toilet paper "to go"
OK I`ve stumbled out of bed and made it to the computer- and another Facebook day begins!
I know u r but what am I ?
Google maps should have a “Scenic!” route option for when we’re not in a hurry and just want to enjoy the ride.
I`m so proud of myself, I spent all night putting my Christmas decorations up myself.. I`m now at the hospital having them removed
I ate 4 cans of alphabet soup, and just took probably the biggest vowel movement ever
Anyone know how much snow is too much snow not to go to the liquor store?