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*wants to travel the world but has like 3 dollars*
People of planet Earth, thank your gods that I`m not in charge of the red button.
There should be an "undo" button in an elevator for when you accidentally hit the wrong floor.
really vry funny
According to cannibals it only takes one vegetarian to make vegetarian chili.
This generation is guilty of making the wrong people rich and famous.
You know you`re getting old when you have to have a drink to motivate you to go out & have a drink.
Twinkle twinkle little star, I want to hit you with my car.
My business card is just a picture of me looking inside the fridge.
"You should`ve come with us!" well, inviting me would`ve helped..
As far as distractions go ... I like to think I`m a good one.
You can tell how old someone is by what part of the chex mix is their favorite.
If you love something,, let it go..... That`s EXACTLY what I`ve done with my body....
When ever I think about the past...It brings back so many memories
Creativity is great, but plagiarism is faster.