Mobile App Coming Soon - Daily Silly Status

Your home to over 150,000 silly Facebook statuses! Find the perfect witty, silly, or downright funny status to share with your friends and family. Check in daily for fresh updates!

I just had a conversation with my-self...but it just turned into an argument. I think it`s that time of the month...
I`ve had like 10 red bulls, so of course I`m vacuuming the front yard.
OH NO !,,,,,,,,, I just realized I can`t stop calling the addiction hotline....
Immature is a word boring people use to describe fun people.
Why do we call it toilet paper? Does anyone wipe their toilet with it?
It saddens me to say that after tasting this homemade whiskey/nacho cheese ice cream, I’ve found not all dreams are meant to be followed.
I`m just doing what the beer tells me to.
If you want to set up a company and run it then that`s your business.
You better not pout, you better not cry, you better not shout I`m telling you why...we have our own problems and nobody cares about yours.
Thoughts of you make my demons nervous.
I can`t wait to get all liquored up, and then go door-to-door to sing some Christmas Carols when it starts to warm up in April...
There are so many things in life I still need to lick.
I`m under the weather today, also so is everyone else, that`s how weather works.
"I went to Jared" I whispered as she slowly opened the velvety box of Subway coupons.
Alright, I give up! I`ve listened to the song like 50 times now, and I still don`t know what the fox is saying!