Your home to over 150,000 silly Facebook statuses! Find the perfect witty, silly, or downright funny status to share with your friends and family. Check in daily for fresh updates!
So when a couple gets engaged on Facebook for April Fools it`s okay to comment "hahaha" but the rest of the year it`s rude??
Ran out of post-it notes, now I don`t know how to remind myself to buy more.
Whenever someone asks me to sign their cast, I always write: ‘last warning, you have a week to get the money together.’
Video Game Logic: Everyone worse than me is my bitch and everyone better than me has no life.
Just saw a cop that had a U-Haul pulled over on the side of the road. Obviously he was trying to bust a move.
Shout out to people who are hard of hearing.
Its awkward touching hands with another man in a popcorn bag, especially if you don`t know the man & he doesn`t know you`re eating his popcorn
Man: "You look nice today..." Woman: "Was I ugly yesterday?"
I don’t care how loud I’m laughing, I’m having fun and you’re not.
The Bible is Christianity’s Terms of Service. Nobody actually reads it, but as long as u agree to everything in it, u can use the Heaven app
I hate that little line of dirt that I can never get into the dust pan.
Things ain`t nobody got time for: That
Card on top of gift reads `I want you wearing this tonight` only to open the gift to find NOTHING
I put the whiskey in another room ... Exercise regimen established.
Clearly if you have to blame yourself, you`re not hanging out with enough people.