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I really need a long road trip, top down, in the Jeep...with a cooler....loud music....and an extra cooler in case the first one isn`t enough
Alcoholic? No. Self-appointed booze quality control technician? Yes.
You only live once.......Unless someone has a defribrilator
It`s ok computer, I go to sleep after 20 minutes of inactivity too.
I am a little worried that every "evacuation route" sign is leading away from my house.
A hard thing about business is minding your own
Is it safe to take off my Winter Solstice Glasses yet?
My wife sure is picky for someone who married me.
When I said I missed you, I meant with a hammer.
My Dr said I am a sex addict. I ask him how he knew and he said you are a man.
How to tell if your wife is mad at you - Step 1. She is
I’m starting to think that some of you are misspelling words on porpoise.
My dentist said that bacon and soda works the same as toothpaste. Friends have said she meant baking soda....but I disagree. :)
Facebook should allow people to be in a relationship with food. That would be my relationship for eternity.
With my background and genetics, you guys should be happy I am half as normal as I am.