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I wasn`t even going for broke. But I got it!
"Don`t try this at home" encourages people to try it at another`s home instead.
Pro tip: when you have a drug test and they tell you to go to the bathroom in the cup, that means PEE. Always.
The term "I paid GOOD money for that!" is soo silly..Honestly, have you ever seen BAD money? NOT ME !!!
Lady`s if you want guys to look at your face instead of your chest ... eat a banana.
Shopping at the Dollar Tree makes me feel rich and poor at the same time
Wake up, kids! Bees can`t even read, much less spell. IT`S A SCAM!
Why is it that whenever you dial a wrong number, somebody always answers?
If you`re stuck in the wild, rub two mozzarella sticks together to start a pizza.
You don`t need training to be a street cleaner, you just pick it up as you go along.
People who go rock climbing: you know you don`t have to, right
Whenever you feel nobody cares or loves you. You should ask yourself...Am I TOO sexy?
You can only push me so far before I breakdance.
I`m going to become a hermit as soon as I find a cave with a decent wifi connection.
I always hit the "no receipt" button at the ATM because I don`t need that negativity in my life.