Mobile App Coming Soon - Daily Silly Status

Your home to over 150,000 silly Facebook statuses! Find the perfect witty, silly, or downright funny status to share with your friends and family. Check in daily for fresh updates!

Why do they play this music on the elevators if we`re not suppose to slow dance.
You only live once.......Unless someone has a defribrilator
If you ever need anything please don`t hesitate to ask someone else first.
There are so many scams on the Internet now these days, but for $19.95 I can show you how to avoid them.
There is no harm in imitating a porn movie. But stopping in between because you are imitating the buffering part (!), is unacceptable.
Running away does not help with the problems unless you are fat
Capitalization can really change a sentence. Example: I love to eat candy ... I love to eat capitalization.
Punctuality is a waste of time since no one is ever there to appreciate it.
Some psychologists say that sleeping naked can help boost a person`s confidence, but nobody in this park seems to appreciate it.
Just ONCE I`d like someone to call me "sir" without adding "this is a place of business, please put your pants back on."
I could spend my day outside, but I`m sure there`s plenty of porn that needs to be rated.
The real trouble with reality is that there`s no background music.
I gave my wife my email address but she keeps on speaking directly to me.
Just because I know I`m a "Good looking, extremely intelligent, funny as hell, sexy ass, Motherf#ker" doesn`t mean I`m "Conceited"...Im more like a "Realist", that just so happens to be very good with adjectives!...A "Bad-Ass Realist", that is!
Before you refer to someone as your ex, make sure they know you dated.