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People should mute themselves on conference calls when they are crossing a battlefield and killing enemies to get to the next level.
I`m just a few smartphone apps away from never having to talk to anyone again.
I wonder how many strangers have stories about me.
I`m about as lost as lesbian on ChristianMingle.com
You`ve really got to hand it to short people, because sometimes they often can`t reach it.
I`m already going to hell ... now I`m just trying to get a good spot.
Sign outside a Drug Rehab Centre: "Keep off the Grass!"
I think my neighbor is stalking me as she`s been googling my name on her computer. I saw it through my telescope last night.
I think I bought just enough fireworks to get my neighbor to move.
I hate it when auto-correct changes my "omg" to "OMG" like, chill out, I`m not that surprised.
If there is not an open bar and a delicious cake at your wedding, I will take my gift card to Walmart back.
I don’t like country music, but I don’t mean to denigrate those who do... And for those who like country music, denigrate means ‘to speak badly of`.
Good neighbors do not put password on their wi-fi.
DO NOT expect a "Bless You" after your 3rd sneeze. Get that sh!t under control.
gua suka sama kamu