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Restaurant Advertisement: We serve food as HOT as your neighbour’s wife; And beer as COLD as your own. :)
Why be difficult, when with just a little more effort, you can be impossible.
All I`m saying is, I`ve never seen my ex and Satan in the same room together.
I was getting really depressed today but then I realized double cheeseburgers exist
Ever since I installed Adblocker, I have been severely depressed. Hot singles in my area are no longer interested in me.
we should drop off a car at the police station before going out tonight so we can drive home in the morning.
If Monday had a face, I´d punch it.
That awkward moment when you`re telling the truth, but start laughing like crazy and everyone thinks you`re lying.
Instead of laughing my a$$ off, I`m going to start laughing my stomach off. I`d rather lose that.
If running late counted as exercise I would be the healthiest motherf*cker you ever saw
Don`t ask me for childcare advice unless you want nuggets of wisdom like "always punch holes in the box so they can breathe."
If you`re not the lead dog, the scenery never changes!
Weekends r like d salary.. It takes a lot to get thr, & whn it finally does, it`s over in no time ;) - aa
Im convinced that one day we will all live in the future.
when in Rome get naked ;)