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Transformation Tuesday! Throwback Thursday! Flashback Friday! Never underestimate a woman`s ability to find a reason to post a selfie.
I got in an elevator with a lady with big breasts. She said could you press one for me please. I did and that was the last thing I remember
For those who do not know what ADHD can do to a person, let me expla.....oooh look i got a text message.
Adulthood is mostly about being tired and wishing you hadn’t made plans.
I`m 5`5" and a HALF. I think men should be pretty impressed that I consider half inches very important when measuring things.
A man asks a trainer in the gym: "I want 2 impress that beautiful girl , which machine can I use?" Trainer replies: "Use the ATM"
Don’t ask me to kill a spider for you & then criticize my methods. Yes, I had to use a samurai sword, & no, I’m not sorry about your table.
If I text with “Almost there!” I haven’t left yet.
Gray hair is the human body`s equivalent of low toner.
*Spoiler Alert*--- Siamese cats are just one cat ... not two cats in one.
Whenever you feel like a genius, remember there was a time in your life when you were learning to not poop your pants.
Why can`t someone look at me the same way I look at pizza?
The general rule is that you shouldn`t ride an elevator during a fire, but I mean, talk about a once-in-a-lifetime opportunity
hell yeah !!!! i was the lucky sperm !!!!!
I could eat a bowl of alphabet soup and crap a better status than yours!