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Your home to over 150,000 silly Facebook statuses! Find the perfect witty, silly, or downright funny status to share with your friends and family. Check in daily for fresh updates!

I`m a huge fan of screaming "You`re welcome" really loud when people don`t say thank you...
I just took a 5 hour energy and a sleeping pill...LET THE BATTLE BEGIN.
My girlfriend would be so mad if he found out that I`m telling people she`s my girlfriend.
you know....I wasn`t planning on going for a run today....but those cops came out of nowhere
Buying new Nikes, call that soul searching
One of the greatest things about owning a dog is how happy they are to see you even though you just stepped out of the house for 30 seconds.
I`m so bored at work that I`m actually doing my job.
God made men. But sandwiches weren`t going to make themselves. So God made women.
Why,does facebook want to make the likes one gets on their status like a story,like:peter and 500 others like this,click and see james and 499 others like this............
If a woman tells you that you’re right, that’s called sarcasm.
Every novel is a mystery, if you never finish it.
I walked briskly with scissors today. I’m pretty wild.
People who think only God can judge them have obviously never met my mother-in-law.
If you still can read this, please inform me ASAP because I have probably blocked the wrong person!
Fool me once, shame on you. Fool me twice, shame on me. Fool me 300,000 times, well then you`re probably a weatherman.