Your home to over 150,000 silly Facebook statuses! Find the perfect witty, silly, or downright funny status to share with your friends and family. Check in daily for fresh updates!
Why do people say ”I saw it with my own eyes.” Do they sometimes use other peoples eyes?
We live in the era of smartphones & stupid people
Farts are just the ghosts of the things we eat.
When exactly are they going to make Xanax fit my Pez Dispenser?
When choosing a ring tone, always ask yourself, "How embarrassed will I be when this rings in public?"
Never wake a sleeping woman. Because then she´ll be awake.
Sometimes I wanna comment on a photo on Facebook but then I don`t wanna have to explain why I`m in your `Random Party Pics 08` album at 4am.
If you don`t boo at people after bad sex, how do you expect to motivate them to get better?
Okay im going to make myself a sandwich, and i better have some votes when i come back. -.-
I am not as think as you drunk I am
You made several good points, and I understand that you are right, but the way you said it was so douchey I have to take an opposite stance.
It`s damn funny when a wife think`s she`s punishing her husband by not talking to him for days..
I’m posing nude for an art class this evening. Nobody asked me to. I think they’re making ceramic bowls.
Apparently telling the airline stewardess that airplane food is "da bomb dat hijacked my tastebuds" is not considered a compliment......
Plastic surgeons are the only people that actually encourage you to pick your nose.