Your home to over 150,000 silly Facebook statuses! Find the perfect witty, silly, or downright funny status to share with your friends and family. Check in daily for fresh updates!
And then her mood ring just...exploded
Edward Cullen is extremely pale due to the lack of light in the closet.
Offering someone food and secretly hoping they say no.
Momma left strict instructions to knock you out.
No matter what the product, a good way to throw off an aggressive salesman is to interrupt him and ask, “Yes, but does it work on cats?”
Its all sh!ts and giggles until someone giggles and sh!ts
Still no news on the royal baby. One will assume its being delivered by Royal Mail
Nobody notices your pain, your happiness, your sadness, your state of mind. But everyone notices it when you fart in public
Don`t forget to turn your clocks back today if you want them to be set to the wrong time.
Saying something stupid and thinking “Yeah, that sounded way better in my head"
A smart man washes his hands after he pees. A wise man doesn`t pee on his fingers.
I`m giving up procrastination for Lent ... starting tomorrow.
I need to start eating more healthy, but first I need to eat all the junk food in the house so it’s not there to tempt me anymore.
Asian gangs, also known as study groups...
I`m so poor I went to the ducks today to beg for bread...