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when she says "size doesn`t matter" what she really means is "I have been disappointed before." :)
Apparently I`m the only one that wants to drink beer at this intervention.
According to Facebook, some people I don`t remember are grilling this weekend.
I used to dream about becoming an astronaut. Now I just dream that there`s still time before the alarm goes off.
Why do medications always have side effects like `anal leakage` & `suicidal thoughts`? Why not `invisibility` or `spontaneous orgasms`?
To all my friends who post Controversial, Obscene, Dirty, Offensive, and Derogatory posts, .. Keep that sh!t up. I like it....
This prefessor`s nuts. He keeps saying pie is square. I know better, pies are round, cakes are square!
Just found out I`m pregnant. At least that`s what this expectant mother sign for my parking spot says.
Ever been in the middle of writing a great post and think, did I just run someone over?
Ebay is really getting worse and worse to use. Yesterday I searched for a cigarette lighter. I got 3,974, 601 matches...
I`m glad it`s the thought that counts because I spend all day thinking about the sh!t I should be doing.
I bet the guy that was looking forward to his next life and came back reincarnated as me is really disappointed.
I`d like to thank the bars for being there for me.
Just found my TV remote and a newspaper in my fridge. It`s pretty awesome that society lets me live by myself.
I don`t need WebMD to tell me what`s wrong with me, I have my mother.