Your home to over 150,000 silly Facebook statuses! Find the perfect witty, silly, or downright funny status to share with your friends and family. Check in daily for fresh updates!
is about to stick a pin in your voodoo doll... brace yourself.
I don`t know what everyone`s complaining about. The economy looks great from my parents` basement.
There is nothing more annoying than a couple who just got back from vacation.
I don’t know if I have a stalker, but if I do, could you drop off some milk. Thanks.
The only correct answer to "Are you ticklish?" is "I have explosive diarrhea right now,"
I`m not lazy, I`m in energy saving mode.
I`d say 20% of my day is spent trying to convince the dog we`re not about to be murdered by the UPS guy, mailman, squirrels, or the ice dispenser..
Everyone can stop painting. We all have cameras that can take perfect pictures of everything.
The word “fireplace” really reveals the creativity of our ancestors
Going to: ? Paris ? New York ? London ? KITCHEN... I`m hungry
I`m really tired but it`s OK. There`s a nap for that.
I would go for a jog today, but it looks like all of these cupcakes expire today as well.
I`ve been baptized five times this week in five different churches. I wish the landlord would hurry up and fix my shower.
I lifted my hands up in the air and waved them like I just didn`t care.....Ceiling fan: 6 Me: 0
Water is the most essential element of life, because without water, you can`t make coffee.