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Your home to over 150,000 silly Facebook statuses! Find the perfect witty, silly, or downright funny status to share with your friends and family. Check in daily for fresh updates!

What number SPF blocks people?
I drink my coffee out of a clear mug so people so where my tolerance level is at.
People assume when I yawn that I’ve lost interest in what they have to say but truth be told, I was never interested.
you know why maths is unhappy? because it got so many problems.
If your pillow fort hasn’t got an armory filled with Nerf guns, then you’re not really taking pillow forting as seriously as you should be.
R2-D2 from Star Wars, still holds the record for most curse words in a movie.
oh look at the time, it`s time to not care
β€œTrue beauty is within” for example opening your fridge.
God made men. But sandwiches weren`t going to make themselves. So God made women.
Cigarettes have warning labels because they are dangerous and addictive yet vaginas are allowed to just roam around freely.
Feeling pretty good about myself today so I`m going to go meet up with an ex-girlfriend to bring me back down to normal
I bet people who like their own statuses wink at themselves in the mirror too.
Don`t kiss behind the garden . Love is blind but the neighbors are not :P
They say do what you love & the money will follow. I love doing nothing. We`ll see.
Our swear jar is always empty because of all the god damn foul mouthed thieves that live in this f*cking house.