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Try sliding down a water slide without running water to realize how important foreplay is
It`s Friday! High-five some sh!t!
Exercising can add years to your life. For example I jogged 4 miles today and now I feel like I`m 73.
People who get offended on the internet are the same people that take mini golf seriously.
Behind every beautiful woman, is a beautiful behind.
No thanks, cardio, this pot of coffee will get my heart rate up just fine
The funny moment when a fat kid says "that`s how I roll".
When I see a cute couple making out I yell, ” I knew you’re seeing somebody else!” and run crying.
The synonym for `reality` is `offline`
The Patriots defensive coverage was almost as bad as the coverage by Obamacare.
You seem to be very educated on the things you make up.
A model citizen is just like a regular citizen that doesn`t eat.
I put the PRO in inappropriate!
Twice-baked potatoes, refried beans, etc.: Damn, people, cook it right the first time or get out of the kitchen!
Doing donuts in the parking lot sounds fun. Eating donuts in the parking lot sounds better.