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Your home to over 150,000 silly Facebook statuses! Find the perfect witty, silly, or downright funny status to share with your friends and family. Check in daily for fresh updates!

I`m thinking about investing some serious cash in gold....or maybe some other color.
People in love use phrases like β€œtakes my breath away” and β€œswept me off my feet”. I think they’re confusing love with attempted murder.
Laugh if you will but this night-light has an undefeated record at repelling Boogeymen.
What if aliens only abduct crazy people, because nobody will ever believe them?
I choked on a carrot this afternoon and all I could think was "I bet a cupcake wouldn`t have done this to me."
I`ve always pictured myself taking selfies.
have you ever tried waking up in the morning? its horrible, the sun`s the wrong place and your head is so damn heavy.
Big shout-out to slugs! Those little guys are out there everyday, doing all the same stuff as snails but without helmets.
Facebook becomes 100 times more entertaining when you have work to do.
Now that I know how many calories there are in a pint of beer , I have decided to stop eating.
Darn right I’m good in bed. ...I can sleep for days.
Its so hot I used my blow dryer as a cooling fan!
Pretty much the most frightening part of my day is when I get a notification that my mother has tagged me in a post on Facebook.
Admit it, we all have that special someone we`d visit if given a tank to drive for a day
If you would`ve told me back in 1999 that we`d still be using animated gifs in 2015, I would`ve said "Wow, what a boring conversation"