Mobile App Coming Soon - Daily Silly Status

Your home to over 150,000 silly Facebook statuses! Find the perfect witty, silly, or downright funny status to share with your friends and family. Check in daily for fresh updates!

I wonder what “don’t touch” is in Braille....
It`s amazing what you`ll wear in public when you`re not trying to have sex with anyone.
I will never be to old to laugh when somone farts in a public bathroom peeing..
Thank you Super Bowl for reminding all Americans how bad we really are at understanding Roman numerals
Why do some people call it a "tuna-fish" sandwich? It`s not like anyone calls it a "chicken-bird" sandwich.
I flunked anger management class.
People who don’t understand sarcasm are awesome.
The male version of a tramp stamp should be called a douche tag.
Playing dead in the supermarket to avoid having a conversation with someone you know attracts more attention than I anticipated...go figure.
Facebook- to help future generations discover if there`s ever been any mental illness in the family.
Time to turn over a new leaf ... With my luck it’ll be poison ivy.
If you think my status updates are ridiculous you should see my life choices
The longer I`m left unattended in the Drs office the more tongue depressors I can lick and put back in the jar..... Just sayin
Welcome to my bedroom,this is where the magic happens.....and by that I mean this is where I read my Harry Potter books.
I always wanted to buy a Parrot and teach it to say, "Help, they`ve turned me into a parrot!"