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I may not look good naked, but I`m a beautiful person on the insi.... Hahahaha just kidding I look great naked
My eye problems starts on Mondays and ends on Friday evening. I see clearer after the fourth bottle.
I was thinking earlier, thats all, just wanted everyone to know that it does happen from time to time........
Today is the day I go back to the gym. Tomorrow is when I stop telling lies.
Radio Shack has stayed in business with a name combining something no one buys anymore and a type of building no one wants to go into.
Hey, does anyone know which side you`re supposed to wear your fanny pack on? I want to really nail this job interview tomorrow.
My neighbour has diabetes and now she won`t make me cupcakes anymore, its like bad things always happen to me.
Screw you recommended serving size. You don’t know me.
You know you`re all grown up when you actually pick up the ice cube instead of kick it under the fridge.
Sometimes I meet people and feel sorry for their dog.
So I turned my phone onto " airplane mode" and threw it up into the air. Worst transformer ever!
I`ve been repeating the same mistakes in life for so long now I may as well call them traditions.
I really hope my spirit animal is a bear because well I would love to hibernate all winter.
I’m not single and I’m not committed… I’m simply on reserve for the one who deserves…
Wouldn`t ventriloquists be a lot cooler if they could throw their farts?