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We still don`t know sh*t about that airplane. - NEWS
I want my next girl to be crazy but more "Lets have sex in public" crazy rather than "I throw hot coffee in your face" crazy.
I had four E`s and LSD last night. Such an awful start to a game of scrabble!!
You do realize everyone can see your status right?
Days are short in December but spending them with family really stretches them out.
I try to live my life by the saying: “You scratch my back and I’ll let you know when to stop.”
Roses are red. Violets are blue. Faces like yours belong in the zoo. Don’t be mad, I’ll be there too. Not in the cage but laughing at you.
Don`t look at me in that tone of voice...
The trick to falling asleep is putting your phone down. Unfortunately, that`s not a risk I`m willing to take.
there`s a fine line between "cocky" and "confidence"...and it just so happens I have perfect balance!
never trust a man in a wheelchair with dirty shoes
If being lazy paid, damn dude I must be a billionaire.
Due to the economic crisis and ever increasing price of food, the 5 second drop rule has now been increased to 10.
I wish I could pick which brain cells the alcohol kills....There`s ALOT of crap I wish I could forget about.....
I wish that life had an option for viewing other available episodes.