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Your home to over 150,000 silly Facebook statuses! Find the perfect witty, silly, or downright funny status to share with your friends and family. Check in daily for fresh updates!

Why is it socially acceptable to wear a bikini at the beach but not on the bus? At the end of the day I’m just a guy in a bikini on the bus.
If Facebook was school I swear we would all have perfect attendance.
Holiday Shopping Tip #112:Next time you see someone with their arms full of bags looking around a parking lot while pointing and clicking their horn button, help them out and start pushing your horn button too!
If I tell you I can`t text you because I`m driving it`s only because I`m also eating.
Hey chicks that only post inspirational shit: we know you’re nuts.
Why do they call a grapefruit a grapefruit? I mean there is already a fruit called a grape!!
You never know what you have until..... you clean your room
Face down, a$$ up ... that`s the way I tie my shoes.
"Bros before hoes" is something a bro without a hoe would say.
Pillow forts have no age limit when you’re awesome.
The difference between me & normal people is the normal
I always buy a Get Well Soon card for the couple who invites me to their wedding.
Doing something weird and thinking β€œthis is why I’m single”.
I like when job applications have a β€œSome College” option so they know I’m an aimless loser.
From what I can piece together, this Pitbull character enjoys "partying"