Your home to over 150,000 silly Facebook statuses! Find the perfect witty, silly, or downright funny status to share with your friends and family. Check in daily for fresh updates!
Some days your the bug; some days your the windshield.
Omg!! got 6 numbers on the Lotto.. and the stupid machine didn´t pick any of them
It is kinda at the point where everything in my life is a movie reference
The good thing about "poking" on Facebook, no babies are created.
Maybe it`s inappropriate for the first date but if there`s a maze on the menu I`m asking for crayons.
I`m reading a book on anti-gravity. It is impossible to put down.
Do you ever get the feeling that you’re being watched? Because if it’s bothering you, I’ll stop.
I am surprised Cheech and Chong have not filmed a new movie -"Cheech and Chong Smoke Colorado"
I would offer moral support ... But my morals are questionable.
My illusion of having the Force is crushed the minute the remote is slightly out of reach.
Don`t be that guy that goes around saying "Don`t Be That Guy."
My boss told me "Dress for the job you want, not the job you have" Am now sat in a disciplinary meeting wearing my Batman costume
I only party on 2 occasions. 1. When it’s my birthday 2. When it’s not…
Went by the bank today and the female teller was flirting with me which was weird considering she saw my account balance.
Due to political correctness issues, "Krazy Glue" will now be known as "Mental Disorder Glue."