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Normal trees probably look at Christmas trees all dolled up and think .. "Whore"
roses are red , violets are blue , I got five fingers and the 3rd one for you ;)
This is a private status. Please don`t tell anyone about it.
Yes officer, the person who robbed me was a woman 25-30, at least 5`9, a brunette and definitely single. Can you arrange a line up please
Aren`t you too fat to be this rude?
Offering a homeless dude $5 from across the street is my version of Frogger.
so, on a scale of one is to seven, which letter of the alphebet is your favourite colour?
When googling something, I always use Caps Lock so that the people from Google know it`s urgent.
When it comes to tantrums, I throw like a girl.
I need professional help. A chef and a butler will do just fine.
To everybody that is single don`t worry you will have your day............ Palm Sunday is just around the corner
Answering your cell when you don`t recognize the number is like picking up a hitchhiker.
I`d be the stripper that got fired for eating her way out of the cake instead of jumping out of it.
12 year olds having sex ? Im sorry when i was 12 i was to afraid to pull my foreskin back incase my d*ck fell out.
Whenever I hear someone say “STOP” my brain says “Hammer Time”