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If you knew what I considered to be my "best behavior" it`s doubtful you`d advise me to be "on it".
So after an hour of playing Paper, Rock, Scissors, we decided to call it a tie. Good game, mirror!
I decided I`m not doing the whole clock-back routine this year. If you need me, I`ll be in the frickin future.
Just joined the support group Hokey Pokey Anonymous ... A place to turn yourself around. ;)
When I bust a move , it stays busted.
The Easter Bunny doesn`t always drink, but when he does I bet it`s hopscotch.
Think you`re going crazy? When you get there, look for me and I`ll show you around.
One day we the women will rap the men lets see how they like it!
Send a man to the store to get 5 items, he will come home with 4. Send a woman to the store to get 5 items she will come home with 54. Its science.
Can I have a free unlimited day trial of being attractive?
Every dog is a badass until you decide to vacuum.
Sorry to burst your bubble, but your waiter doesn`t really think your choice was excellent.
It`s ok, ghosts, no-one believes in me either.
Just realized the irony of putting Bacon on my VeggieBurger..........
Not a day goes by when I don`t try to use The Force.