Your home to over 150,000 silly Facebook statuses! Find the perfect witty, silly, or downright funny status to share with your friends and family. Check in daily for fresh updates!
Admit it, you should be doing something else really important right now but your on Facebook again.
I wish we had staff meetings in the garden. The plants would`ve love the fertilizer.
Dropped my cheeseburger in the dirt before I ate it. That`s about as organic you`re gonna get out of me.
How big does a cupcake have to be before it`s just a cake?
Even if your life was a total waste of space, there’s always hope that you’ll die in a weird enough way to make a CSI episode.
I don`t like selfish people. I saw this guy pushing like 50 carts at Wal-mart last night. Really? You think someone else might want one?
Today my role will be played by an overworked, under caffeinated, sarcastic, unstable, asshole. Consider this my disclaimer for the day.
dont love..dont hurt...keep doing flirt..:)
Well, Thanks to SAMSUNG, flat screens are no longer `Flat`.
I’m drinking something. I`ll give you a hint: It starts with a B and rhymes with....um..... “beer.”
No thanks, NASCAR. If I wanted to spend 8 hrs watching a car drive around in a big circle, I`d go on a road trip with my mom.
thinks that life was a lot simpler when I thought girls had cooties, and getting to the bottom of the sandbox was a good day.
Apparently, driving past police cars while drinking water from an old vodka bottle isn`t `funny` and is technically `wasting` police time :(
Netflix would be by far the best dating site. "Here are 9 other singles in your area who have also watched Pokemon for 12 straight hrs"
my husband of 10 years still goes mad when I use his toothbrush, if anyone knows a better way to get dog poo off shoes, im all ears