Your home to over 150,000 silly Facebook statuses! Find the perfect witty, silly, or downright funny status to share with your friends and family. Check in daily for fresh updates!
I`ll drink enough for both of us, because I`m just a caring person.
You guys make Facebook worth it! Just kidding, we are all wasting our lives.
"Give me your finest meal, money is of no concern." ~ Me at McDonald`s on pay day.
They say that nobody is perfect, then they say that practice makes perfect. I wish they`d make up their mind
Basketball would be a lot more exciting if each team was allowed one bear.
When you get angry at someone count out loud to ten. When you get to eight, throw a punch. Nobody expects that sh!t.
One day you will meet someone so amazing in every way who will want absolutely nothing to do with you.
bored out of my mind in class i began staring into space... space happened to be right in front of me at the time...
She deleted and blocked me so I guess you can say we`re taking it slow now.
People really need to get with the times. Smartphones are not for talking anymore.
Silence is Golden, but telling some people to go f*ck themselves is PRICELESS...!
"American Pie" ruined it for any kid that actually does have an amazing story from band camp.
Iām planning on ringing the new year in with a kiss ... whether my dog likes it or not.
I`d tell you to go to hell, but I work there and I don`t wanna see you everyday.
Why can`t insomnia start in the morning.