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Yeah, I was dropped as a baby. Into a pool of sheer awesome.
I should be cleaning and disinfecting the toilet bowl today cause I have a feeling I`ll be hunched over hugging it later tonight.
Guys, Everyone. Listen. I`m going to say two words that will change your lives. Pizza Tacos. I know. Just breath.
LIKE IF you… walk into a room, forget what you need, walk out, and then remember.
If you lick the frosting off a cupcake it becomes a muffin, muffins are healthy :) your welcome.
This is bullshit. It`s like the cops don`t even know that the speed limit is different when you`re listening to AC/DC.
Help me Obi Won Bacardi, I`m sobering up.
( )( ) =( `-` )= <( . )> ("`)("`) bunny!!
Of course you have a right to your own opinion. Just like I have a right to tell you to shove it up your a$$.
Hawaii is a great place to live if you hate being eligible for contests.
Coffee gives me the illusion I`m actually awake
You would think with all the ice water laying all over the world, it would be a lot cooler...
I checked my horoscope today and all I can say is ...WOW!! I`m a Taurus and I looked it up and sure enough,it says I was born between 4/21-5/21!! Well played horoscope, well played.
Turns out indoor stone throwing is a mistake no matter what your house is made of.
I always found it a little counter productive when the teacher would say "Don`t get smart with me!"