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Easter can be just as much fun as an adult as it was as a child. Just paint and hide beer cans instead of eggs.
I just want someone who will love me for the a$$hole that I am ;)
I`m kind of clueless about pop culture. I thought "Hogwarts" was an STD
Men are like dogs. We’re excited to see you and have no clue what you’re mad about.
According to physics heat makes matter expand.....therefore I don`t have a weight problem....I`m just hot
I thought I was a bit hardcore until I saw this guy sucking on a soy sauce packet like an Otter Pop.
Parallel lines have so much in common, it`s a shame they`ll never meet
Bipolar smile :(: ...... Gets um everytime !
If you ain`t laughin, you ain`t livin!
There`s really no telling how successful I could have been if the internet hadn`t been invented...
Lets not kid ourselves, if the zombie apocalypse broke out, there are a couple people we would swear were zombies so we could shoot them
First comes love, then comes marriage. Then comes not making any decisions and feeling guilty about asking for blowjobs.
When I asked if you had protection, pepper spray isn’t what I meant.
The only thing I drink from a shot glass nowdays is Maalox.
Why aren`t we letting blind people think that dragons are real?