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Just slung my bra off & threw it to the other side of the couch where there are already 2 other bras. If my math is right, it`s Wednesday.
I saved someone`s life today. Well, I resisted the urge to strangle the life out of some idiot. That`s the same thing, right?
When I want your opinion, I’ll give it a funny voice.
I think sex is probably the best stress reliever, but I haven’t beaten anyone with a baseball bat before, so I can’t be 100% sure.
I don`t always agree with everything I say. :)
What if there were no hypothetical questions?
Welcome to Psychic Abilities 101. Today`s class was just rescheduled for tomorrow. If you`re here now, you failed.
Women are fascinated by mythical creatures like unicorns, vampires, and men who are good listeners...
Did I already do my deja vu joke?
How to cure a headache: 1. Drink a glass of water. 2. Take 10 deep breathes. 3. Give headache your credit card & tell her to go to the mall.
Was the little pig who built his house out of straw some sort of idiot?
I`ve never gone to bed with an ugly woman. Woken up to a whole bunch of them though.
I hate when its dark and your brain is all "you know what we haven`t thought about in a while ... demons."
just spilled alphabet soup on my keyboard. I`m so confused
I wish I had Dora`s mom and dad, they let that girl go everywhere.