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A baby`s laughter is one of the most beautiful sounds you will ever hear, Unless it`s 3am. And you don`t have a baby, And you`re home alone.
"Fidget Spinners are so dumb pointless." -The generation that purchased over 5 million Pet Rocks.
i feel naked without my mobile !
FB friends, no one gives a ratsass what concerts you went to...
If anyone could do it, it wouldn`t be called PROcrastination.
I want to be rich enough to realize that I can’t buy happiness.
I`m not saying that I`ve been online too long, I`m just saying that when I close my eyes I scroll through my thoughts
Why is it always "I see you drank all the beer today!" instead of, "Oh, honey, that was so sweet of you to help clean out the refrigerator."
Why is it the less money someone makes the better they are at reproducing?
If there wasn’t such thing as a last minute I’d never get anything done.
This Tequila tastes like an afternoon of fun and bad decisions.
I knew we were gonna be friends when you ran into that wall.
I`ll never forget the first time we met. Although, I will keep trying.
Don`t let this historic Cubs World Series win distract you from the fact that Donkey never made Shrek those waffles he promised to make.
If someone farts at a poker tournament, no one will ever know who did it.