Your home to over 150,000 silly Facebook statuses! Find the perfect witty, silly, or downright funny status to share with your friends and family. Check in daily for fresh updates!
Anyone who believes that children are our future has not been to a mall recently.
My bed has no frame and sits directly on the floor because under-bed monsters are just one less thing I have to worry about now.
So I ran into an old girlfriend who I dated who`s new boyfriend she was with looked exactly like me when I was seeing her. You know, miserable
I am losing Facebook friends at an alarming rate. Whatever it is that I said, is working like a charm.
Never look at your beer as half-empty. Look at it as you’re halfway to your next beer.
The bottle of Pepto Bismol say’s 4 out of every 5 people SUFFER from diarrhea... does that mean that one of them enjoys it?
The guy who used to proofread Hitler`s speeches was the first grammar Nazi.
Jack daniel was found dead by johnie walker at castle strt under savanna tree,captain morgan believed dat he was killed by strongbow.his 4cuzns said that he was best in j&b club at knights...
Neil Armstrong lands on the moon: 5 pictures. Girl goes to Bathroom: 47 pictures.
Actually officer, if you factor in the earth`s rotation, we were all speeding.
Roses are red, so is my wine. Refill my glass and I`ll be just fine.
My grandfather once waited in line for 36 hours to get a loaf of bread and I can`t wait two seconds for a Youtube video to load.
I just want to be famous enough to have a Wikipedia page full of misinformation about me.
Man:Hello doc, my wife is having a baby. Doctor:Is this the first child? Man:No, it`s the husband speaking.
Some girls post the most depressing love sh!t that even I`m starting to miss their ex!!!