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It only takes a few seconds to show someone how you feel about them......the police call it indecent exposure but whatever.
I like the part of the day where we eat the food.
It’s a good thing not everyone has a smartphone. Someone has to honk when the light turns green.
Forget beauty sleep. I want skinny sleep.
You`ve never been truly drunk until you`ve had to use a barstool as a walker to get home.
Are you one of those people that get hurt from things posted on Facebook? You can easily avoid that by keeping your a$$ off of Facebook.
Most kids today wont understand the joy of playing with the telephone cord.
Someone’s going to ruin things; it might as well be me.
If you come to myspace and twitter about my yahoo, can I google over your facebook?
Life before the internet was awful. Your friend would be wrong about a trivial issue during dinner and you just had to let it go
I have an irrational fear of speed bumps but, I’m slowly getting over it.
I decided to bury the hatchet with that neighbor I never got along with. After all, it is the murder weapon.
You lost your phone and it`s on silent? Too bad. If you liked it then you should`ve put a ring on it.
my girlfriend asked me to go to the store and pick her up 50 shades of grey, she was pretty mad when i brought home 50 tubes of lipstick.
People who weigh their produce. What`s it like to have all the time in the world?