Your home to over 150,000 silly Facebook statuses! Find the perfect witty, silly, or downright funny status to share with your friends and family. Check in daily for fresh updates!
Dear children, when you look under your bed, what exactly are you planning to do when you find me? Sincerely, The Monster.
It takes a brave man to admit when his wife is wrong .
I watched my first Porn the other day. I looked so much younger back then!
All the coffee in Colombia couldn`t make me a morning person.
Not to brag but when I push it, I push it real good.
A funny thing to do would be to text random numbers with "I got the live bees you sent, they`ll do nicely"
The phrase "Go see your Ford dealer" means something completely different in Canada than the United States.
The internet...turning cowards into tough guys daily.
Finding a date on the internet is so much easier than real life because how are they supposed to know that`s not your Ferrari?
If God didn`t want us to eat Animals he wouldn`t made them out of meat.
Never hire an Electrician with no eyebrows
Sometimes I just bang my head on the keyboard and hope words form.
You know you had an awesome night when you need sunglasses to get food out the fridge.
I`m glad I don`t work in an office. I can only imagine the smell at lunch time when everybody opens their egg salad sandwiches today.
Who wants to go Smart Car Tipping?