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Your home to over 150,000 silly Facebook statuses! Find the perfect witty, silly, or downright funny status to share with your friends and family. Check in daily for fresh updates!

I bet Waldo`s parents are worried sick.
PLEASE - put this on your status if you know someone (or are related to someone) who has been eaten by dragons. Dragons are nearly unstoppable and, in case you didn`t know, they can also breathe fire. 93% of people won`t copy and paste this, because they have already been eaten by dragons. 6% of people are sitting in the shower armed with fire extinguishers and the remaining 1% are awesome and will re-post.
I`m ashamed of what I did for a Klondike bar.
Spinning in circles to get dizzy as a child was my first attempt at getting high.
It should cost $10 to leave someone a voicemail.
Instead of the John, I call my bathroom the Jim...that way it sounds better when I say I go to the Jim every morning.
Of course I`m using OJ as a mixer, it`s flu season.
hearing that Jesus loves you is very nice unless you`re in a Mexican prison
If you`ve never actually got dressed, got in your car & pretended to drive "to work" to get a chick to leave your house then you`re not me.
I love updating my Facebook status while crossing the stre
No thank you.No thank you.No thank you.No thank you.No thank you.No thank you.No thank you.No thank you. I just want the oil change
You would think with all the ice water laying all over the world, it would be a lot cooler...
My room isn`t messy. I just prefer to have my favorite items on display.
Beautiful people are more beautiful when surrounded by ugly people
I`m at the point in my life where "friend with benefits" just means a person who gives me their Bed Bath & Beyond coupons.