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Summer is here. I`m in the process of moving all my bad habits outside.
At hotels, you can either take a helicopter tour of the city or drink the bottle of water on the table. They cost the same.
The phrase, “Don’t take this the wrong way” has a zero percent success rate.
I made a New Years Resolution to gain 20 lbs, so I can relish in the sense of accomplishment and success!
Irons are like 1000 degrees, who`s bright idea was it to make an ironing board the flimsiest contraption ever made?
If you`re camping and you have WiFi, you`re not camping.
People with the loudest car audio systems usually have the worst taste in music.
My favorite drink is the fullest one on the table.
The heat index is somewhere between OMG and WTF!
i like cake. and thats all for today goodbye :)
Can anyone tell me how to become a illegal immigrant, their benefits are undeniably more superior to our own.
At any given time my wallet is worth more than its contents.
Do girls that make duck faces in pictures walk in a V formation at the mall?
Tried to donate blood today but they had too many questions about where I got it.
If you get pulled over, ignore the cop and tell him that your mommy told you not to talk to strangers.