Your home to over 150,000 silly Facebook statuses! Find the perfect witty, silly, or downright funny status to share with your friends and family. Check in daily for fresh updates!
I don`t know which is worse... waiting for someone to get out of the bathroom so you can use it or hearing them say "come in" when you knock on the bathroom door...
Still waiting for a "Where are they now?" episode about the Flintstones
Step 1: Remove food from packaging. Step 2: Throw out packaging Step. 3: Dig packaging out of trash to locate cook time, Repeat steps 2 & 3 as necessary
Thank God I still have 20 days to achieve my goal of "going to the gym in 2013."
Women aren’t that complicated. They just want an honest and genuine guy who will give them insincere compliments they might not deserve.
Is running in front of cars some sort of gang initiation for squirrels?
WTF, I feel like I pay these bills every month.
No horror movie can surpass the sensation of touching your pockets and not feeling your cell phone.
Did anyone else go into a furious, violent rage when they found out that George Lucas filmed most of Star Wars here on Earth?
The world is full of nice guys who want naughty girls who want bad boys who want nice girls who want nice guys.
Deja Vu: When God thinks something is so funny he has to rewind it to show it to his friends
Confucius would have been great at Status Updates......
This is not the status message you are looking for .... Move along
Cops never say “thanks for committing crimes and keeping us employed”. It’s just plain selfish.
United Airlines was just voted number one in Chinese takeout!