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Cauliflower is just broccoli ghosts.
You call the shots. I`ll drink them.
Political debates are great if you want to watch idiots talk to us like idiots to prove that the idiot next to them is a bigger idiot.
Some people are like clouds. When they disappear, it’s a brighter day.
I just told my brother he was adopted, his response was, "At least they picked me"
Meditation never worked for me, so I tried something even better..."Beditation"! You lay down close your eyes and you wake up an hour and a half later!
I feel so stupid for cashing in my retirement account early. But then I always feel stupid using the Coinstar machine.
Reverse Psychology: DO not STALK MY FB PAGE. YOU ARE not OBSESSED WITH ME...
This one isnt that funny, keep scrolling.
My plan for today? Same as always: Drink coffee and be sexy.
My opinion of yoga pants varies depending on if I`m at the gym or if I`m at Walmart
one day a man seen a fairy, and asked.... could you make me irresistible to all women.... so she turned him into a credit card. :`D
Question everything...Or should you?
Not only am I a master of suspense, but I
It must suck to be an air conditioner repairman. You spend your day working in buildings that have no air conditioning. When it`s fixed and finally cool, you leave.