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I’ve probably wasted a solid year of my life just staring into the fridge.
Running away does not help you with your problems, unless you are fat.
I wouldn`t mind being alone with my thoughts, if I didn`t know them all so well.
The older I get the more I understand Squidward`s anger.
When will vegeterians stop eating my food`s food??
Safe words are for quitters.
wassup pips! :-) no i don`t mean you guys pip, get it? piping?? haaahaaa... looks like i`m the only one laughing right? well it sounded funnier in my head (-_-)
Is it wrong to use cheat codes for Wii Fit.
Maybe one day a loooong time ago a kid decided to play hide and seek with his pet Bigfoot but just didn`t explain the game properly.
It`s really difficult to find what you want on eBay. I was searching for cigarette lighters and found over 15,000 matches...
When the machines rise up against the humans, just pray to your God that you`re nowhere near a dildo factory.
The greatest fear is NOT fear itself. It’s dropping your phone in a port-a-potty!
Never be mean to nerds. You never know, one day you might be working for them!
I party like a rockstar. A very poor rockstar who isn`t in a band.
No really I`m fine, I have drugs and alcohol to block out reality, but thanks anyway...