Daily Silly Status

Talked to someone in person today....what a pain in the a$$ that was!

It takes two people to lie....one to lie.....the other to listen

When she says she`s madly in love with you, concentrate more on the word madness.

There is no such thing as failure. There are only results.

You know its a bad day when your fat pants are tight :(

Three words to ruin a woman`s ego. "I can`t tell."

My bank lets me send a text message and it´ll text back with my balance. It´s a cool feature but I didn´t think the LOL was necessary.

Do these people in movies who wander off into the woods alone at night not watch movies?

I just broke a light bulb. Damn, is that 7 years of bad ideas.

I tried counting sheep to get to sleep, but one was missing and now I’m gonna be up all night worrying.

Please help control the pet population, have that special talk with your pet!

Girls these days be like `I wanna get the Double Ristretto Venti Half-Soy Nonfat Decaf Organic Chocolate Brownie Iced Vanilla Double-Shot Gingerbread Frappuccino Extra Hot With Foam Whipped Cream Upside Down Double Blended, One Sweet`N Low and One Nutrasweet, and Ice tan look`

Life`s short ... Drink fast

When the nurse calls my name at the doctor`s office, I like to run through the waiting room like I got called on The Price is Right

There are weight limits on car seats, airlines, skydiving, military, horseback riding, kayaks, and bikes……how is it there are no weight limit on high heels?